May 12, 2010 • 1 note

Historic Event

Let it be known: it is 8:50 on a SCHOOL NIGHT, and my homework is done. Done. Every “t” is crossed, “i” dotted. There’s nothing left. You might be wondering what accounts for this miracle. It’s simple:

  • Laptop=off (except for scholarly endeavours)
  • Phone=gone (aka, confiscated by my mother)

My mom’s been right this entire time. I can be so much more productive without any distractions. Must remember this for the future….

May 10, 2010

Ironic?

Mom: Did you get Casey's Twitter? After I told her about that research on how your generation spends so much time managing their image, rather than finding themselves, she deleted her Facebook account.
Jill: You mean, she deleted her Facebook account to prove she didn't care about her image, then she Twittered about it?
Mom: ...
May 10, 2010
Men get such hardons from putting their names on things. You guys don’t grow up. It’s like you need to pee on everything.

Natalie Keener

Up in the Air

Why is demeaning men so stinking entertaining?

May 8, 2010

Activities Accomplished Upon our Arrival at Dartmouth:

  1. Lunch (while drawing pictures with the paper and crayons provided by the restaurant)
  2. Cake (chocolate mousse, of course)
  3. Coffee (a must)
  4. Bonding over cake and coffee (and by bonding, I mean reliving our horrible childhoods)

We have our priorities in order. 

October 19, 2009 • 1 note

The Gardiner Girls Way of Getting Over Things

(Note, it's witty banter, not the other possibilities mentioned in the following conversation. . . that would just be weird)
Casey: Jill, have you seen my latest Tumblr?
Jill: (who-cares-eye-roll) No.
Casey: You should. It will make you happy.
Jill: Does it involve killing all men except the ones you use as sex slaves?
Casey: No.
Jill: (walks away)
Casey: But I like that idea!
October 7, 2009

Romeo, Romeo, Where art thou Romeo?

Some excerpts from my homework assignment about my first impressions of Romeo after reading Act I Scene I of Romeo and Juliet:

  • “Not only is Romeo disgustingly susceptible to the throes of love, but, to give him even less of a back-bone, he is a victim of unrequited love.”
  • “…Romeo had fallen into a never-ending well of self pity…”
  • “…his ‘love’ is, in actuality, a shallow crush that does not even give the guise of being more than a physical attraction.”

My mom says I need to work on lessening my venom …

October 6, 2009

Theories of the Day

Writing is a skitzofrenic process!

—Mr. Gustafson

(Algebra) is a course in creative laziness.

—Ms. Bratt

October 5, 2009

Text Times

Jill: You're making jokes already - a sign that you're getting over your heartbreak!
Rob: NEVER! I'm watching my Big Fat Greek Wedding and eating mac and cheese.
Jill: WE CAN SPRAY WINDEX ON YOUR BROKEN HEART!
October 4, 2009

Sesquipedalian

(adj) given to or characterized by the use of long words.

Doesn’t that inspire the (possibly incredibly small) part of you that wants to improve your vocabulary?

October 4, 2009
You got makeup, Jill got a cupcake - all is right with the world.
Mi madre (upon her return from AZ)